Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
