She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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