sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
