I don't think brook has ever known best
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
