It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
