if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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