have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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