Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
