Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
