im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
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