Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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