just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
