my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
