I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
this will be a night to untag.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
