She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize