the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
