We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
