I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
