yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
