i already hear my dad disowning me
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
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