That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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