We won't sleep together?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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