Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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