im drinking this country out of the recession.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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