Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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