I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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