I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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