everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
