you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
