Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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