I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
