Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
