I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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