I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
