bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
