i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
