Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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