Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You made out with two different species that night
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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