On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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