it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
