you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
