But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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