I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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