Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I could fuck to npr.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
