She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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