question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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