Please, let me fuck your mom
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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