I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
