my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
