She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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